Why You Keep Getting Triggered (and How to Start Healing It)
- Jennifer Hansen-Silva
- May 4
- 4 min read
Introduction: When Small Things Feel Big
Have you ever found yourself reacting intensely to something that, in hindsight, didn’t seem like a big deal? A look. A comment. Being left on read. These seemingly minor moments can cause disproportionate emotional responses, often leaving us confused or even ashamed afterward.
These reactions are not random. They are called emotional triggers—responses rooted in past experiences, trauma, or unresolved emotions. Understanding why these reactions happen is a powerful first step toward emotional resilience and healing. This article explores what emotional triggers are, why they happen, how the nervous system plays a role, and how you can begin working with them intentionally—starting with a free resource designed to support your healing process.
What Are Emotional Triggers?
An emotional trigger is any stimulus—internal or external—that evokes a strong emotional reaction, typically one that is rooted in the past but activated in the present. Triggers can be people, words, smells, tones, environments, or even internal thoughts and feelings.
For example:
A raised voice might instantly make you feel unsafe, even if no threat is present.
Feeling dismissed or ignored may evoke anger or sadness because it mirrors a childhood experience of neglect.
A partner needing space might trigger deep feelings of abandonment.
Emotional triggers are often connected to core wounds or unmet needs—such as the need to feel seen, valued, respected, or safe. They are not signs of weakness but rather indicators that a part of you is asking to be acknowledged and healed.
The Neuroscience of Triggers
Understanding the brain's response to triggers can help remove the shame or confusion often associated with emotional reactions. When a person experiences a trigger, the amygdala, part of the brain’s limbic system, becomes activated. This area is responsible for processing emotions—especially fear, anger, and threat detection.
When the amygdala senses danger (even if it’s just perceived), it sends a distress signal to the body, activating the sympathetic nervous system and prompting a fight, flight, freeze, or fawn response. This happens quickly and often bypasses the prefrontal cortex, the part of the brain responsible for logic and reasoning.
This reaction is referred to as an amygdala hijack, a term coined by psychologist Daniel Goleman in his work on emotional intelligence. The amygdala can override rational thinking, leading to outbursts, shutdowns, or anxiety in response to a trigger—even if the present situation isn’t objectively dangerous.
The hippocampus, the brain’s memory center, plays a role as well. It stores emotional memories and works with the amygdala to interpret new experiences. If a current event feels similar to a painful past experience, the hippocampus may “flag” it as threatening, even if you are safe now.
Sources:
Why Triggers Are Not the Problem
It's important to understand that triggers are not flaws. They are signals from the body and nervous system alerting us to old wounds that have not yet been resolved. Instead of trying to suppress or avoid triggers, a more compassionate and empowering approach is to explore them.
By asking, “Why am I feeling this way?” or “What is this reminding me of?” we can begin to uncover the deeper emotional roots behind our reactions. When met with awareness rather than judgment, triggers become valuable tools for inner healing.
Rather than viewing a reaction as over-the-top or embarrassing, you can start to see it as a call to attend to a part of yourself that is still carrying emotional pain—often from childhood.
The Hidden Cost of Unhealed Triggers
Ignoring or suppressing triggers can have long-term emotional, physical, and relational consequences. People who are unaware of their triggers may:
Overreact in relationships, damaging trust or communication.
Avoid vulnerability, missing out on connection and growth.
Feel emotionally exhausted, overwhelmed by constant internal tension.
Develop coping mechanisms such as perfectionism, people-pleasing, or emotional numbing.
These patterns can lead to chronic stress and even physical symptoms like fatigue, inflammation, and digestive issues, due to the body being in a prolonged stress response.
Furthermore, when we don’t take time to understand our triggers, we tend to repeat the same emotional patterns and feel stuck, leading to frustration and stagnation in our personal and professional lives.
Healing Begins with Awareness
Healing from emotional triggers isn’t about “getting rid of” them—it’s about building awareness and choosing how we respond instead of reacting automatically.
The first step is to begin noticing:
What situations or people trigger you?
How do you feel emotionally and physically in those moments?
What past experience might this be linked to?
This process can be deeply healing, especially when approached gently and without judgment. Over time, you begin to reclaim your power and expand your capacity to respond to life from a grounded and centered place.
One of the most accessible tools to begin this process is guided reflection—which is why I created a free Triggers Worksheet to help you get started.
Free Download: The Triggers Worksheet
The Triggers Worksheet is a simple but powerful tool to help you explore your emotional patterns, build awareness, and begin your healing process.
Inside the worksheet, you’ll find:
A space to identify recent emotional triggers
Guided questions to help uncover the root causes
Prompts for noticing your emotional and physical responses
Reflection space to begin reframing and reclaiming your narrative
This resource is ideal if you want to:
Better understand why certain things affect you
Create more emotional space in relationships
Begin your healing journey with clarity and self-compassion
Download the free Triggers Worksheet here:
Final Thoughts: From Reaction to Empowerment
Everyone has triggers. They are not a sign of failure or weakness but a reflection of our humanity and our lived experiences. The more you become aware of your patterns, the more you can shift from unconscious reaction to empowered response.
Working with your triggers doesn't have to be overwhelming. With compassionate attention, reflection, and the right tools, you can begin to heal emotional wounds that have followed you for years—and begin showing up in your life with more authenticity and peace.
Start with awareness. Start with curiosity. And if you're ready, start with the Triggers Worksheet.
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